I was thinking about the first time I met my guru. A sign board at the entrance to his ashram caught my eye. There it was written,“It’s easy to become a Hindu, a Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, a Buddhist. Those willing to be a good human being, come to me.”
You’re born into a family with a certain label, and it’s easy to adopt that label as your own. But the real work of being a good human being goes beyond those labels. Good human beings have existed in all traditions and the way I look at it everybody is a good human being. Everybody is striving to be good. We all want to be liked, to feel that we are good people.
In yogic philosophy, being a good human means staying true to your dharma in every situation. Dharma is about living according to your essential nature. Just like fire’s dharma is to provide warmth and water’s dharma is to offer coolness, the dharma of a human being is to find a place in others’ hearts.
Be kind. Be kind to yourself first and then to the other who is in front of you. Everyone needs a little kindness, even those who might not seem to need it or deserve it. Being kind is one of the most important qualities. Recognizing that everybody is trying their best. It may not seem like it sometimes, but know that wherever they are in their life, they are trying. And you are trying too, so have a little space for yourself.
Listen. How often do we really listen to the person who is in front of us? Usually when someone is talking, we are already reacting with judgment or thinking about what we will say next. When we listen without judgment, we open space for the other person to fully express themselves in a safe environment. Most people just need to be heard, not fixed.
Accept what is. We are all a work in progress, constantly striving to improve. Constant self-judgment and criticism blocks us from truly embracing ourselves and from extending kindness to others. Acceptance means recognizing where we are and where others are, without always pushing for change. It’s about appreciating the present while acknowledging that improvement is always possible.
During times of conflict, it’s important to maintain this perspective of goodness. A good human being pays attention to and accommodates the needs of the other. Always ask yourself if your actions and words will promote harmony or contribute to division. When our interactions start to become negative, how good it feels when we can stop that train of negativity. You can almost feel the expansion in your heart at that moment. That goodness is God and by remembering the goodness in the other person we are remembering God.
Being a good human being is honoring ourselves and honoring this gift of life that we have been given. It is remembering that our dharma is to see that goodness in each individual – not to fix them. The highest spiritual teaching is you are Divine and so is everyone else. Seeing God in everything, in everyone, in every situation.
It’s simple: if you look for faults, you’ll find them, but if you seek out goodness, that’s what you’ll see. When you set out to look for good in the other you are honoring your own goodness. You are being a good human being.